Wow. I must've been in a strange mood yesterday because I wrote that my plan was to eat one piece of sugar a day, and I meant it! But as I've found out over and over again in the past ten years, I am not a normie. I am unable to control the amount of my sugar intake. Like the alcoholic who takes one drink, and never knows if that one drink is going to lead to two or three or five or six or two bottles, I also never know what eating one piece of cake is going to do to me. Yesterday, it was three pieces of cake and a 1/2 of chocolate covered matzoh. I could tell you the pieces of cake were small but it doesn't matter what size they were. What matters is that I could not control myself.
I realize that I must surrender to my addiction. I don't want to but I must. I'm not ready to but I must. I'll never be ready to but I must. Tomorrow, my niece and nephew and my niece's bff arrive and I want to show them a good time. The only way I can do that is if I'm in control of what I put in my mouth. I'm not going to get down on myself, that's the one thing, I won't do.....I've had too many years of that. What I am going to do is plan my meals and the frequency of them a little bit better.
I have found a wonderful website at which you can track your calories, your exercise, and journal. I'm going to try and be more consistent in doing that. The website, fyi, is www.fatsecret.com and it's all free! I highly recommend it to those trying to get on track as I am.
A little prayer might help, too.
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